Whoa!!! Ive just been hit by a tidal wave of emotion. Right now Im full on teary eyed and suffering from a massive hole in my heart thats been caused by distance.
Im pretty sure that everyone knows that my mom passed away just over 3 years ago. The pain of losing her is a constant in my life, and I have my good days and my bad days. People who told me that it gets easier as time goes by were sorely mistaken-it never gets easier, never. But Im learning to deal with it.
Anyways, todays reason for my emotional rollercoaster was caused by my sister. She lives in Texas with the three people who I love more than life itself-my nieces...aka: my girlies, my boo's, my everythings. I suddenly realized that I havent seen them in 7 months. But whats worse than that is that I havent even spoken to them in weeks. Maybe its selfish of me, okay-Im certain that it is-but Im afraid that they are going to forget about their Auntie. Kids grow up so fast and not being able to see them regularly is tough enough, but not hearing their voices is heartbreaking!
So basically, my saddness is comming from my own selfish desires to be loved, and remembered...but more importantly, it comes from my need to never let those three precious girls think that their Auntie doesnt love and miss them. And now I realize that Ive got to do anything I can to make sure that doesnt happen. Since we have those gaps in time together I think I need to fill in those voids with as many cards, letters and emails as it takes to keep me on their mind--and more importantly in their hearts, always.
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